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This is Chort, a Final Fantasy 14 dungeon boss of absolutely no real significance, but a hero to us all

Final Fantasy 14 has some weird bosses. In fact, some of the hardest encounters in the game are against enemies like his cobbled-together majesty, Perfect Alexander, and then whatever awaits us in Kefka’s ultimate-tier clown show when it launches this summer, but they’re all old news as far as I’m concerned. The real FF14 sickos are all about a new dungeon boss, Chort. He lives in the Clyteum.

Chort—a patch 7.5 boss with zero spoken lines who violently rolls around the arena a few times before he’s slain for a pair of gloves—is the new weird little (big) guy players are obsessed with. We’ve only known Chort for about a week, and his popularity rivals last month’s Evercold reveal. I’m only sort of kidding, but look at this guy.

Love this guy. (Image credit: Square Enix)

He’s of no major significance to the plot, and he doesn’t drop anything particularly good, but he’s beloved by all for his clearly seasoned battle posture—just look at that wide stance, ain’t no one tipping him over—and brick house build. He’s also quite the speedy boy, and has a whole mechanic where you’ve got to dodge him as he flings himself around the arena.

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