WWE SmackDown Results 3/1/24

WWE SmackDown Results 3/1/24
Desert Diamond Arena
Glendale, Arizona

You can follow me on Twitter @TheHootsPodcast

Commentators: (Corey Graves & Wade Barrett) 

Ring Announcer: Mike Rome

Transcription by Josh Lopez

The Bloodline Segment 

Roman Reigns: Glendale, Arizona. Acknowledge Me. It used to be louder. I know it’s not me, it’s got to be you. Maybe we’re in the wrong place. Let’s try this again. Phoenix, Arizona. Acknowledge Me. We’re going to try this one more time, and if you don’t get on my page, I fulfilled my obligation and I will leave. Last shot. Glendale, Arizona. Acknowledge Me! We’re done here. Call the FBO. Get the jet ready. This appearance is done. You’re welcome. We’re done here.

Paul Heyman: But my Tribal Chief, we have some other business. We can’t leave yet. He’s coming out. Just give a moment. Ladies and gentlemen, in just a moment, The People’s Champ, The BDE in WWE, the greatest movie star of all-time will be out here, live. The Rock. After this commercial break.

The Rock: Are you sure you want to boo The Rock? Before The Rock drops some gospel on you, he has some good news to share. The Rock has got some newa that you would probably like. The Rock has got some news that you would probably be proud of. Apparently, Glendale is ten miles away from Phoenix. Assuming the answer is yet, but are there a lot of people from Phoenix here tonight? I knew it, because that would make sense. The Rock did a little bit of research, and here’s what he found out. This is the truth, this is a fact, the number one city in America for Cocaine and Meth use is Phoenix, Arizona. And here’s what that means, finally, your life has meaning. Because finally, you cactus loving crackheads finally have something worth shooting in your veins. As you sit, and you look at greatness, finally, The Rock has come back to Arizona. Glendale, can you feel it? You can feel it in the air, because it’s real. The Rock’s body is in chills. The Rock is in a good mood, The Universal Champ is in a good mood, Jimmy is in a good mood, Solo is in a good mood. You wouldn’t know it by looking at him, but that’s his happy face, he’s in a good mood. And here’s why we’re in a good mood, Glendale, Arizona. Because once again, and it’s been decades, professional wrestling is cool.

Professional wrestling is exciting. Professional wrestling is in a word, electrifying, once again. It’s why in Birmingham, Alabama, sold out. It’s why in Salt Lake City, Utah, sold out. It’s why tonight, in this crack den with popcorn, we are sold out. It’s why, next week in Dallas, Texas, sell out. Two weeks from now, in Memphis, Tennessee, The Rock is coming back home, that baby is going to sell out, too. And here’s why, because its greatness is among you. Wrestling is cool again because of The Rock, Roman Reigns and The Bloodline. But you know who’s not cool? It’s your hero, Cody Rhodes. Cody, you think you’re tough, boy? You want to run your mouth and you want to challenge The Rock? You want to go one-on-one with The Great One? See how tough you are, boy, is that what it is? Well, The Rock sees you, he hears you. And right here live in Glendale, here’s The Rock’s answer on SmackDown, one-on-one with The Great One, and The Rock’s answer is no. You think you’re just going to go one-on-one with The Great One just because you want to? That’s not how it happens. That’s not the real world. Glendale, you know that, and The Rock knows that. But guess what, Cody, the world wants to go one-on-one with The Rock. Everyone wants to go one-on-one with The Rock. You know who else wants to go one-on-one with The Rock? Every woman in this arena.

Now, you settle down, you crackhead Karen’s, you meth head Mary’s, because The Rock will tell you this, right now. There’s no way that you are ready for The Rock’s 22 inches of heaven, baby. Get your mind out of the gutter. The Rock is not talking about his holy Moses, no, no, no. The Rock is talking about the 22-inch guns that are hanging from his shoulders that he’ll wrap around Cody Rhodes, but it’s not going to be one-on-one. Cody Rhodes, you think that you’re tough, you think you can go one-on-one with The Rock. Are you an idiot? Right now, you got the biggest WrestleMania match of your career against the most dominant champion in the history of the WWE. And you’re challenging The Rock? Well, The Rock, Roman Reigns, The Bloodline, we saw your challenge, we heard about your challenge, we had a laugh about your challenge. But now, The Rock is a businessman, we are businessmen. We have a counteroffer for you. Here’s the counteroffer, shut your mouth and listen to the counteroffer. Cody, you think that you’re tough, you and your new best friend, that walking clown emoji, Seth Rollins. That walking clown show, Seth Rollins, you think you’re tough?

Well, how about this, here’s the challenge. On Night 1 of WrestleMania, the biggest tag team match in the history of the WWE, the biggest tag team match in the history of professional wrestling. It’s going to be Cody and Seth versus The Universal Champion and The People’s Champion, The Rock. But it’s not going to be a regular tag team match, if you accept. Because The Rock and Roman Reigns can easily beat the piss out of you. But here’s what we want to do, we are going to give you a shot, if you two jabroni’s beat The Rock and Roman Reigns on Night One, then on Night Two at WrestleMania, your championship match, Cody Rhodes, will be free of The Bloodline. No Jimmy, no Solo, no Wiseman, and no Rock. We’re gone. Barred from WrestleMania. We’ll get the lawyers, we’ll the sign the contract, you have The Rock’s word, and you’ll have Roman’s word. If you beat us on night one, then Cody Rhodes, you get a shot to finish your story, one-on-one with Roman Reigns. But there’s always a but, when The Rock and Roman Reigns beat your candy asses on Night One, then on Night Two, for your championship match, Cody Rhodes, it’s Bloodline rules, anything goes. The Rock might pull up a chair right next to his boy, Pat McAfee, and call the match. Maybe Jimmy’s the referee. Maybe The Wiseman takes out a foreign object. Maybe Solo wants to sing the national anthem. It’s Bloodline Rules. I know the idea of Solo singing the national anthem is very funny. You got a hell of a voice, but let The Rock finish, so sit there and shut your mouth. Or Bloodline Rules, The Rock will take that chair he’s sitting in, and he’ll find his way over to you, Cody, and he’ll just bash your brains in, and it will be legal.

So, you got a lot think about, boy, you and your walking clown show, Seth Rollins. You think you’re tough? You think you can go two-on-two with the greatest pairing in the history of sports and entertainment, is that what you think? You meet us next week in Dallas, face-to-face, and you give us your answer. Because here’s the thing, you listen to this, Cody Rhodes, and you too, you walking emoji clown show, Seth Rollins. Here’s the thing, if you don’t accept this challenge, and we’re giving you an option, if you don’t accept it, then you know, they know, and the world knows that The Rock will do everything in his power to make sure you don’t win that title. And let me tell something else, punk, there’s no man back there that can stop The Rock from making that happen. You know where The Rock sits. You know The Rock sits at the board. You know The Rock owns it all. Which means The Rock is your boss. And there’s not a man back there that can stop The Rock. It’s not a general manager, it’s not an executive vice president of who gives a shit. And here’s the thing, Cody Rhodes, if you don’t accept this challenge, then The Rock and Roman Reigns will end your story, tragically. So, how tough do you think you are, punks? You meet us next week in Dallas, Texas. You meet us on SmackDown. And you give us your answers. If You Smell.

Roman Reigns: I need something from you. I’ll do anything for my family. But I need this one thing. Acknowledge Me.

The Rock: Roman Reigns, my family, I acknowledge you as my Tribal Chief. Let The Rock explain something to you idiots. This is family. And we will do anything for family. Now, go home and smoke some more crack. If You Smell, (The Rock hands the microphone over to Roman)

Roman Reigns: What The Bloodline Is Cooking!

– We see Austin Theory having a conversation with Grayson Waller. LA Knight wants to know where AJ Styles is at. Knight is holding a steel chair. Waller calls Knight a weirdo. Waller and Theory poke fun at Randy Orton. Randy is standing right behind them. Randy relives what Logan Paul did to him at the Elimination Chamber. He wants to rip someone’s head off tonight. Waller decides that Theory will be Randy’s opponent. Theory is tired of Waller throwing him under the bus.

First Match: Naomi vs. Tiffany Stratton

Collar and Elbow Tie Up. Stratton applies a side headlock. Naomi whips Stratton across the ring. Stratton drops Naomi with a shoulder tackle. Naomi drops down on the canvas. Stratton showcases her athleticism. Stratton talks smack to Naomi. Naomi with a waist lock go-behind. Naomi scores the elbow knockdown. Naomi mocks Stratton. Stratton calls for the test of strength. Stratton kicks Naomi in the gut. Stratton pulls Naomi down to the mat. Naomi reverses out of the irish whip from Stratton. Naomi with a running forearm smash. Naomi repeatedly stomps on Stratton’s chest. Naomi with a Corner Dropkick for a two count. Stratton launches Naomi over the top rope. Naomi with The Roundhouse Kick. Naomi drops Stratton with The Slingshot X-Factor.

Stratton regroups on the outside. Stratton regains control of the match during the commercial break. Stratton with a Cartwheel Handspring Back Elbow Smash. Following a snap mare takeover, Stratton with a Running Double Foot Stomp for a two count. Naomi buries her shoulder into the midsection of Stratton. Naomi nais Stratton with The Heat Seeker for a two count. Palm Strike Exchange. Naomi with forearm shivers. Stratton avoids The Roundhouse Kick. Naomi with a Pump Knee Strike. Stratton responds with The Spinebuster for a two count. Naomi with a Running Bulldog into the middle turnbuckle pad. Naomi pulls Stratton over the top rope. Stratton rakes the eyes of Naomi. Stratton drives Naomi face first into the top turnbuckle pad. Stratton connects with The PME to pickup the victory.

Winner: Tiffany Stratton via Pinfall 

Second Match: Bayley & Dakota Kai vs. The Kabuki Warriors w/Iyo Sky  

Kabuki Warriors jump Bayley before the bell rings. Double Irish Whip. Sane drops down on the canvas. Double Rib Kick. Sane with an Axe Kick. Running Bulldog/Basement Dropkick Combination. Asuka poses for the crowd. Asuka with clubbing blows to Bayley’s back. Bayley with a double leg takedown. Bayley transitions into a ground and pound attack. Asuka launches Bayley over the top rope. Bayley rocks Asuka with a forearm smash. Sane knocks Bayley off the top turnbuckle. Asuka with clubbing mid-kicks. Bayley shoves Asuka. Bayley sweeps out the legs of Asuka. Bayley with a forearm smash to Sane. Asuka stops Bayley in her tracks. Asuka whips Bayley into Kai.

Asuka toys around with Bayley. Forearm Exchange. Sane tags herself in. CodeBreaker/BlockBuster Combination. Sliding Kick/Sliding Forearm Combination for a two count. Sane starts rag dolling Bayley. Sane tags in Asuka. Assisted Boot Wash. Meeting Of The Minds. Bayley with a drop toe hold into the middle rope. Bayley with a straight right hand. Bayley drops Asuka with The Middle Rope Stunner. Kai slowly gets back on the ring apron. Bayley uses her feet to create separation. Bayley goes for the hot tag, but Kai jumps off the apron. Bayley is displaying her fighting spirit. Bayley tees off on Kai. Kabuki Warriors attacks Bayley from behind. Kai slaps Bayley in the face. Sky nails Bayley with The Running Meteora. Damage CTRL makes Bayley stare at Sky.

Match Result: No-Contest 

– Damage CTRL runs into Jade Cargill in the backstage area. Nick Aldis appears and says that he’ll deal with Damage CTRL later on. Aldis wants to have a conversation with Jade in his office.

Third Match: Bron Breakker vs. Xyon Quinn 

Breakker connects with The Spear to pickup the victory.

Winner: Bron Breakker via Pinfall 

– Legado Del Fantasma Vignette.

Fourth Match: Santos Escobar vs. Carlito In A Street Fight 

Rockers Punches. Escobar shoves Carlito. Carlito with The Lou Thez Press. Carlito transitions into a ground and pound attack. Carlito dumps Escobar out of the ring. Carlito slams Escobar’s head on the steel ring steps. Carlito pulls out a table from under the ring. Escobar kicks Carlito in the gut. Escobar with a straight right hand. Escobar with a knife edge chop. Carlito sends Escobar back first into the ring steps. Carlito grabs an apple much to the delight of the crowd. Escobar lands The Suicide Dive. Escobar has complete control of the match during the commercial break. Escobar puts the trash can over Carlito’s head. Escobar with The Corner Meteora for a two count. Escobar talks smack to Carlito. Escobar with a forearm smash. Escobar dumps Carlito out of the ring. Escobar goes for The Suicide Dive, but Carlito counters with a big chair shot. Carlito clotheslines Escobar. Carlito scores the elbow knockdown. Carlito throws the trash can at Escobar.

Carlito puts the trash can over Escobar’s head. Carlito delivers a series of chair shots. Carlito hits The Twisting NeckBreaker on the chair for a two count. Carlito rolls a table into the ring. Escobar drops Carlito with a Pump Knee Strike. Escobar with a Step Up Enzuigiri. Escobar puts Carlito on the top turnbuckle. Escobar gets crotched on the top rope. Legado Del Fantasma gangs up on Carlito. Escobar with The Triple PowerBomb for a two count. Garza and Carrillo sets up a table in the corner. The LWO finally comes to the aid of Carlito. All hell is breaking loose in Glendale. Rey Mysterio appears on the stage. Mysterio attacks Garza and Carrillo with his crutch. Escobar tells Mysterio to bring it. Carlito lands The Apple Mist. Carlito with The Backstabber. The LWO blasts Legado off the apron. Stereo SomerSault Planchas. Mysterio connects with The 619. Carlito plants Escobar with The Spinebuster through the table to pickup the victory.

Winner: Carlito via Pinfall 

– Next week on SmackDown, Bobby Lashley will battle Karrion Kross. Logan Paul will also be on the show.

– Nick Aldis tells The New Catch Republic that he and Adam Pearce are having discussion about the Undisputed Tag Team Title Match at WrestleMania XL. Aldis proceeds to run into LA Knight. Aldis told AJ Styles to stay home tonight. Knight says that he’s willing to go to Styles house. Knight says that there’s nothing Aldis can do about it.

Fifth Match: Randy Orton vs. Austin Theory w/Grayson Waller 

Kevin Owens joins the commentary team for this match. Orton blocks a boot from Theory. Orton with two uppercuts. Ortn slams Theory’s head on the top turnbuckle pad. Orton with repeated uppercuts in the corner. Orton transitions into a corner mount. Orton with an european uppercut. Orton with a straight right hand. Orton slams Theory’s head on the announce table. Waller runs interference. Theory drives Orton face first into the steel ring post. Theory with a Belly to Back Suplex on the announce table. Theory mocks Orton. Theory has complete control of the match during the commercial break. Theory ascends to the top turnbuckle. Orton is throwing haymakers at Theory. Orton HeadButts Theory. Theory goes for The Blockbuster, but Orton counters with a Vertical Suplex. Orton delivers The Garvin Stomp. Theory reverses out of the irish whip from Orton. Orton with two clotheslines. Orton ducks a clothesline from Theory. Orton Powerslams Theory.

Orton clotheslines Theory over the top rope. Orton with a Belly to Back Suplex on the announce table. Orton rolls Theory back into the ring. Orton kicks Waller in the gut. Orton nails Waller with a Belly to Back Suplex on the announce table. Orton hits The Draping DDT. Theory blocks The RKO. Theory drives Orton shoulder first into the ring post. Theory with The Roll Through Blockbuster for a two count. Orton blocks The A-Town Down. Theory with a cross chop. Theory delivers a chop block. Theory rocks Orton with a forearm smash for a two count. Orton blocks The Draping DDT. Theory slams Orton’s head on the top rope. Theory goes for The Roll Through Dropkick, but Orton counters with The RKO to pickup the victory. After the match, Waller attacks Orton from behind. Kevin Owens tees off on Waller. The numbers game catches up to Owens. Owens drops Theory with The Stunner. Waller blocks The Stunner. Orton plants Waller with The RKO. Orton gives Owens a fist bump and celebrates as the show goes off the air.

Winner: Randy Orton via Pinfall 

Checkout Episode 402 of The Hoots Podcast